Projection is a term social psychologists use to describe what we do in social interactions. We tend to "project" our problems, our experiences, our perceptions, and our inadequacies onto others. How many times have you heard an overweight person call another person "fat"? How many times have you heard a person who is demanding comment on another person’s commandeering personality? Yes, the simple fact is we tend to be "pots who call the kettle black." We tend to project our inadequacies onto others to protect our psyche. So beware before you go putting somebody else down because the boomerang comes right back to you!

Now, how can we use this to our benefit? Well, if we project our inadequacies onto others, what if we spotted the strengths of others on a consistent basis, would we not become more of that strength? Social psychologists say yes and my testament is that this is very true. We can continue to build character in ourselves by recognizing character in others. By recognizing these positive traits in others, WE will exhibit these characteristics more often in our actions and behaviors.

"John, have you lost a few pounds? Wow, what are you doing? You are such a hard worker and so dedicated to continue your diet." Trait: Dedication and Work ethic.

"Something I’ve always admired about you, John, is your ability to perform under pressure. Calm, cool, and collected even though there is a storm brewing all around you. Good stuff."
Trait: Poise.

"Every single time, John. Every single time! You are here 15 minutes early every time. Your punctuality is inspirational! Your respect for my time is obvious and you are truly a professional."
Trait: Punctuality.

These are all excerpts from hand-written note I have received this year. Don’t EVER write a Thank you note again! Write PWR Notes! Personalized, Written, and Relational.  When you are personalizing the note, point out the trait in that person that you most admire and would most like to see improve within you. 

What character trait would you like to build within yourself? Happiness, trustworthiness, honesty, humor, enthusiasm, etc? Search for that in others throughout your day and then write them a handwritten note acknowledging that trait, THEN WATCH YOURSELF BECOME MORE OF THAT TRAIT! It’s so cool and it works! And not only that, while you are improving yourself, you’re making them feel really good! How cool is that?!!

Here’s the formula:
1. Think of a client, business associate, or family member who exudes the behavior you want to work on for that week (or period of time).
2. Write a note to the person acknowledging what you admire about them and why you like working with them or being with them. This is NOT a thank-you note; you are admiring a specific trait and acknowledging a behavior based on a trait.
3. Complete your note and mail it today. Mail at least one note per day for the week.
REVIEW your success. Have you become more punctual, more enthusiastic, more honest, etc? Truthfully, it will take you three weeks of implementing this formula to see signs of improvement, but when you see it, it is POWERFUL!

If you aren’t being referred, it’s because you aren’t "REFER-ABLE". Being refer-able means being of good character. Improve your character and increase your referrals. Increase your referrals and increase your profit. Increase your profit and improve your lifestyle. Enjoy.